Home » Cold Start: The Serious Jaguar Instrument Cluster Hiding A Huge Smiley Face

Cold Start: The Serious Jaguar Instrument Cluster Hiding A Huge Smiley Face

Cs Jagdash

You’d think anything so pretentious as to be labeled “Functional Efficiency Allied to Beauty” would be terribly, terribly vigilant when it comes to doing anything undignified and silly, right? This 1960 Jaguar Mk2 brochure certainly fits into that category: serious, elegant, refined. Not silly, not even in the slightest. And yet, when it comes to explaining what all the levers and knobs and sliders and chromed nubbins there do, we’re confronted with this:

Untitled 9

See where I’m going, here? Lemme assist you:

Vidframe Min Top
Vidframe Min Bottom

Cs Jagdash Face

How did they not see this huge, goofy face staring right at them? It’s like a Cheshire Cat, all wide eyes and colossal grin. You can’t crow about “functional efficiency allied to beauty” and then throw this shit at us, Jaguar. Come on.

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CaptainZoll
CaptainZoll
2 years ago

” It’s like a Cheshire Cat”

A Cheshire… Jaguar?

samfinnz
samfinnz
2 years ago

My long-suffering dad had to sell his Mark 2 for something that mum could drive after I was born. I think it’s the closest thing to original sin I believe in.

GiantIain
GiantIain
2 years ago

I’m assuming you guys never had Roland Rat over there, he was a kind of anarchic muppet kids tv show ‘host’ here in the UK in the 80s.

Anyway, it’s a well known thing over here that the previous gen Ford Fiesta’s instrument cluster and steering wheel looks exactly like him.

bertfrog
bertfrog
2 years ago

Little known fact:
Wilbert Awdry (Author of Thomas Tank Engine series) worked as a technical writer for Jaguar in post-war England as a side gig when the children’s books weren’t selling well. He left his mark too on the Mk2.

(Not really)…

TOSSABL
TOSSABL
2 years ago

A Jaguar MkII is my idea of what a GT sedan looks like

Ranwhenparked
Ranwhenparked
2 years ago
Reply to  TOSSABL

This is basically the archetype of what I think all luxury car dashboards should look like – big expanses of beautiful burl wood, tastefully restrained chrome accents, minimal plastic, and no giant screen showing off the driver’s fingerprint smudges

Limeycars
Limeycars
2 years ago

For extra Britishness, the PRNDL-stick indicator actually spells PNDLR. It’s a horrible transmission.

MATTinMKE
MATTinMKE
2 years ago

The Automatic Transmission Lever/Overdrive Control (#20) and the Directional Indicator & Flasher Lever (#26) make a nice mustache!

MaximillianMeen
MaximillianMeen
2 years ago
Reply to  MATTinMKE

It’s a Jaguar, those are whiskers.

Jack Trade
Jack Trade
2 years ago

In a related yay for materials advancements, I’m so glad we’re seeing the return of toggle switches in some cars.

We went through that looong period where they were replaced entirely by buttons, but like here, toggles look so cool, and while buttons are better than touchscreens for many things (in my book anyway), what’s even better is flipping a switch. Esp. if they’re in a row and something lights up near them.

PaysOutAllNight
PaysOutAllNight
2 years ago
Reply to  Jack Trade

Returning to toggle switches? This is a 1960 brochure.

You have a time machine you’re not sharing with the rest of us?

samfinnz
samfinnz
2 years ago

They’re popping up in a handful of sporting and higher-end vehicles. I think it’s a situation where something needs to go aaaalllll of the way out in 95 percent of cases before it becomes trendy for the few.

GiantIain
GiantIain
2 years ago
Reply to  samfinnz

I think it’s a legislation thing, certainly in Europe. There is a (apparently) a risk of impaling yourself on toggle switches in an impact. While they weren’t banned completely, any impact needs to be spread over a larger area, hence the guards around the toggle switches in Minis for example.

jadielyn
jadielyn
2 years ago
Reply to  Jack Trade

Admit it, you like long activation sequences with lots of switch flipping, buttons, displays and readouts flashing to life, and a knife switch thrown in for good measure. 🙂
Or maybe that’s just me. Whether it’s Airwolf’s startup sequence, the Jaeger suitup and activation, or even the amp sequence at the beginning of Back to the Future (not to mention all the lovely buttons and toggles of the time-traveling Delorean)

Used to be every time I adjusted the rearview to dark mode at night I’d flash on Wash flipping an overhead switch while flying the Serenity from Firefly … IMDb trivia claims Alan Tudyk said he would flip the same three switches overhead anytime he was given an order on the bridge. Verisimilitude!

jadielyn
jadielyn
2 years ago
Reply to  jadielyn

Come to think of it, I blame Batman. “Atomic batteries to power, turbines to speed….”

Jack Trade
Jack Trade
2 years ago
Reply to  jadielyn

That is *exactly* what I like. Punching buttons is so…Alien. Shudder.

I also imagine Steve McQueen and the other racers methodically actuating their switches as the clock ticks toward 4pm.

flyingstitch
flyingstitch
2 years ago

Chromed Nubbins is my band name.

Also, I find it hilarious that the lighter sits between the ignition switch and the starter button.

nlpnt
nlpnt
2 years ago

I noticed the gauge “eyes” and horn ring “smiling mouth” right away from the lead pic, but didn’t think PRNDL=nose until I saw the highlighted schematic.

Drew
Drew
2 years ago
Reply to  nlpnt

Same. If anything is a nose in the photo, it is the emblem on the steering wheel.

zeppelopod
zeppelopod
2 years ago

The case could be made for the central spar of that steering wheel to be a well trimmed British mustache.

Also, out of curiosity, what does “Cold Start” denote, as far as types of articles?

nlpnt
nlpnt
2 years ago
Reply to  zeppelopod

First article of the morning, always posted by Torch because he’s on the east coast.

zeppelopod
zeppelopod
2 years ago
Reply to  nlpnt

Thanks!

Also, if the site is still taking suggestions, a notification to show when someone’s replied to you could be good to have.

flyingstitch
flyingstitch
2 years ago
Reply to  zeppelopod

It’s basically what was “Blip” on a certain other site where Torch worked.

Bob
Bob
2 years ago

All that Burl

MATTinMKE
MATTinMKE
2 years ago
Reply to  Bob

Love the Burl.

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