“AMCÂ 360 article” reads the subject line of an email that will forever go down in history as the most epically unhinged correspondence I’ve ever received. The message, from a Wisconsin reader named John, who used his actual email for some reason, is so unbelievably vitriolic and unhinged, one could argue that it’s traveled the full circle from low-quality junkmail to literary masterwork. Because for what it is, this threatening bit of hate-mail is actually beautifully written.
[Note: This article includes harsh and threatening language, which we at The Autopian take seriously. With that said, I’ve moved recently (and done some research into the email’s author), and don’t feel like I’m in any real danger. I also want to note that I don’t know what the author was going through at the time he sent this email; I wish him well. -DT]
Let’s Establish That I’m Not A Huge Fan Of The AMC 360 Engine
Back in April, shortly after the founding of this website you’re currently reading, I wrote an article titled Why The AMC V8 Engine Found In Some Of The Greatest Cars Of All Time Is Such A Humongous Pile Of Shit. Here’s a screenshot of the headline and top image, which shows an AMC V8, an equals sign, and a rather cute little poop pile sitting atop an American Motors Corporation logo:
A little controversial? Sure. Maybe even provocative. But I have good reason for this; I’d owned multiple AMC 360-powered Jeeps, and they were all inefficient, underpowered, and not particularly easy to work on. Plus, in the case of my 1979 Jeep Cherokee Golden Eagle, the motor was actively ruining my life — a fact that, as I noted, factored into me writing that article:
[Before I get started, allow me to just vent for a moment. I spent all of Sunday trying to get my 1979 Jeep Cherokee Golden Eagle’s replacement AMC V8 engine running. Should I have been editing, writing, answering emails, researching, and hiring? Yes. But instead I was elbow deep inside what has to be the most poorly designed engine I’ve ever had the misfortune of dealing with. The shittiness of the AMC V8 is severely jeopardizing The Autopian’s future outlook; that’s fitting, in some ways. Anyway, it’s not solely my frustration that’s leading me to write this article; the AMC 360 truly is a poorly-designed motor, as I will now show].Â
My article continues with me contrasting the unstoppable AMC inline-six and the rather-stoppable 360 V8, which was supposed to be an upgrade:
You may know American Motors Corporation as builder of the greatest Jeep engine of all time, the AMC inline-six, a motor that came primarily in 232 cubic-inc, 258 cubic-inch, and 4.0-liter displacements. This long iron-block motor, found in pretty much every Jeep between 1970 and 2000 — was absolutely unstoppable (If you want to be “in” with the Jeep crowd, just say “That foar leeter is bulletproof I tellya” anywhere near a gas station) thanks to its simple design, ease of serviceability, and plentiful low-RPM torque.
It’s surprising, then, that the same company that built that amazing off-road motor developed the AMC V8, a contraption whose only reliability was liability, and that was ubiquitous in AMC products for decades. The thing went in damn near everything as the “step-up” from the six cylinder, even though, really, it was a huge step down. Let’s take a look at some machines burdened with hauling around this iron menace.
From there, I point out the AMC 360’s suboptimal timing cover design. From a packaging/complexity standpoint, it is brilliant, but the fact that the engine’s oil pump has a tendency to eat itself and starve the motor of oil is just sad:
AMC owners also complain about lubrication concerns with the rearmost cylinder, I have complaints about packaging making the engine relatively difficult to service, and of course there’s the fact that the 500 pound mill makes no power and sucks fuel like mad. Plus, parts aren’t that easy to find.
There’s a reason why so many Grand Wagoneer owners just yank their V8s and chuck in Chevrolet Small-Block motors.
I realize it’s controversial, and plenty of folks in the comments took umbrage with my criticism, and that’s fair. Maybe I was a little harsh. I can see how this particular part of my article venting about an engine whose design I don’t like might have ruffled some feathers, even if it was meant to be a bit tongue-in-cheek:
I’m fairly sure fellow AMC-lovers are going to come out of the woodwork to defend the AMC V8, which came primarily in three variants: 304, 360, and 401. “Mine has driven over 200,000 miles,” some will say. “This guy just doesn’t know how to wrench,” others will claim. “It was a torquey, stout motor,” many will cry. “Some of these have been built into highly successful race motors” others will assert. And to them I say: Wake up.
I was a sheep like you once, having fallen head-over-heels for the American Motors way of life. The soulful designs; the charmingly weird blend of Ford, GM, and Chrysler parts; the generally-stout hardware; and just the bold, Smallest-Of-The-American-Automakers rough-and-tumble way of doing things. Like you, I used to see AMC vehicles, especially Jeeps, through rose colored glasses. Hell, I currently own seven AMC-era Jeeps, and I’ve owned many more in my past! I even visited Kenosha a few years ago solely to pay homage to AMC, and I recently snuck into the old American Center former headquarters in Southfield, Michigan. I’m a diehard AMC fan, believe me.
But I have no choice but to call a boat-anchor a boat-anchor…
So now that we’ve gotten that established, let’s get to the death threat:
The Death Threat Email
Three months after publishing that article, I received the aforementioned “AMCÂ 360 article” email. I’ll just paste it in its entirety, and then go through it line-by-line afterwards:
Your article about the AMC 360 is wrong and you’re a complete dipshit. The reason your engine failed is because you didn’t do routine checks and preventive maintenance on it before it failed.You’re a fucking ass clown for blaming the engine for the problems that you yourself created after you failed to perform the maintenance an old vehicle needs to prevent problems with it in the present day!Nope… You probably bought an old vehicle and just kept driving it instead of properly sorting it out. So then, after this mess you caused for yourself, you being the overly accomplished writer you are, took it upon yourself to write an article and trash an entire line of engines that is known for beating the Big 3 on the drag strip and in many other racing outlets from it’s inception until present day.Oh and let me guess. You probably weren’t even using oil designed for flat tappet camshaft engines too! Right? Haha. You were probably using some bullshit oil you bought from a gas station down the road because it was good enough! Right? Or was it the same oil you like to use in all those Jeep Cherokees you have rotting away in your back yard. Yeah. Yeah. I know your kind of people. Those are all the “some day” projects. You know. The projects you’ll eventually get to “some day” after you finally strike it rich with your whimsical writing ability!!! Right??You sir fancy yourself as a Jeep aficionado but you are not. You’re some clown that buys old Jeeps and parks them in your back yard… or seeing that you’re from Florida… front yard… so you have something to tinker with then write about or make videos about with your buddies to try to make money from with your new stupid website!Here’s the bottom line dude: You’re just a garbage wanna be journalist out there getting attention for himself to sell merch and making a living. That’s all you are. A pathetic little man with a big stupid mouth.So this is what I’m going to tell you right now. If I ever run across you in public, I’m going to make sure you never write another thing about an AMC v8 engine ever again. That’s a promise dude.Now if you can please go properly fuck yourself, I’d really appreciate it. You miserable piece of shit. Fuck you!
My lord. Okay, let’s just go through this a bit, because it’s just so gloriously juicy.
Your article about the AMC 360 is wrong and you’re a complete dipshit. The reason your engine failed is because you didn’t do routine checks and preventive maintenance on it before it failed.
John comes out swinging with a strong opening line. He establishes that I’m wrong and a dipshit — honestly, from a journalistic standpoint, this is a strong lede. He then claims that my engine’s struggles are my fault, not AMC engineers’ fault. But before we go too long without some spice, he follows that up with this:
You’re a fucking ass clown for blaming the engine for the problems that you yourself created after you failed to perform the maintenance an old vehicle needs to prevent problems with it in the present day!
A “fucking ass clown”! Let’s continue:
Nope… You probably bought an old vehicle and just kept driving it instead of properly sorting it out. So then, after this mess you caused for yourself, you being the overly accomplished writer you are, took it upon yourself to write an article and trash an entire line of engines that is known for beating the Big 3 on the drag strip and in many other racing outlets from it’s inception until present day.
Here John sarcastically pokes fun at my writing skills, and notes — as I predicted in my article — that the AMC 360 has some race wins under its belt. Then he gets seemingly belligerent, laughing about the oil I use and making fun of my Jeep “collection”:
Oh and let me guess. You probably weren’t even using oil designed for flat tappet camshaft engines too! Right? Haha. You were probably using some bullshit oil you bought from a gas station down the road because it was good enough! Right? Or was it the same oil you like to use in all those Jeep Cherokees you have rotting away in your back yard. Yeah. Yeah. I know your kind of people. Those are all the “some day” projects. You know. The projects you’ll eventually get to “some day” after you finally strike it rich with your whimsical writing ability!!! Right??
Well John, I’ll have you know that I use Shell Rotella, which has over 1,110 parts per million zinc — it coddles those flat tappets like a mother coddles a newborn! Plus, I’ve mostly kicked my Jeep hoarding problem!
Let’s keep going:
You sir fancy yourself as a Jeep aficionado but you are not. You’re some clown that buys old Jeeps and parks them in your back yard… or seeing that you’re from Florida… front yard… so you have something to tinker with then write about or make videos about with your buddies to try to make money from with your new stupid website!
What?!
…
This whole Florida part about a front yard is so absurdly strange that I don’t even know what to say. Who in this situation is from Florida, and what does that have to do with which yard you park your cars in?
Also, don’t call The Autopian stupid! Me? Sure, but not The Autopian. You’ve taken this too far, John! Too damn far! But he goes farther:
Here’s the bottom line dude: You’re just a garbage wanna be journalist out there getting attention for himself to sell merch and making a living. That’s all you are. A pathetic little man with a big stupid mouth.
Is it bad that my biggest concern with the quote above is the lack of parallelism? If you’re going to write “sell” you have to write “make,” not “making.” Parallelism matters!
Anyway, let’s get to the part that seems an awful lot like a death threat:
So this is what I’m going to tell you right now. If I ever run across you in public, I’m going to make sure you never write another thing about an AMC v8 engine ever again. That’s a promise dude.
Now, there’s a chance that by “I’m going to make sure you never write another thing about an AMC v8 engine ever again. That’s a promise dude,” what John means is that he’ll sit me down, and present a slideshow that irrefutably extolls the virtues of AMC V8s — a slideshow that will forever change my view on the engine that I called an “iron menace.” It’s either that, or he plans to injure me in such a way that my writing abilities are severely compromised. Though really, if we’re being honest, this is a death threat.
All this over an article about an engine that hasn’t been in production for over 30 years, by a company that hasn’t existed in over 35 years, and built in a plant that no longer exists! This whole thing is nuts, though I have to applaud the way John concludes, because — like that lede — it’s quite effective, journalistically speaking:
Now if you can please go properly fuck yourself, I’d really appreciate it. You miserable piece of shit. Fuck you!
While I don’t know if the email warranted its own article response (I am not a Jeep/AMC person so I don’t have a stance here), and the content is disturbing in its own right, I just want to thank the graphic designer for that header image, which still has me laughing.
“You’re some clown that buys old Jeeps and parks them in your back yard… or seeing that you’re from Florida… front yard…”
Florida? Florida!? Sir, you have gone too far!
DT, might you suggest to the writer kindly put the meth pipe down. so this is what inbreds do in between finger banging their sheep? interesting.
Meh. Your initial article was kind of overstating it. That AMC V8 was designed by an underfunded engineering department, working with slide rules and a ‘good enough’ ethos, from the beginning to end. With 1950’s and 1960’s technology. Of course it has a very poor performance envelope in stock form.
The important thing here, is that it CAN be made to sit up and hop if given some love.
Here’s an article by Motor Trend that gives readers another take than yours:
https://www.motortrend.com/how-to/1905-dont-ditch-amc-v-8/
That said, I find there a ton of rust belt oldsters, who have sort of mentally ossified in place, and are still living in their imagined world of 1969. If you desecrate the altar of their unreasonable love and devotion, whether it’s a CJ5 or an AMC 327, they tend to erupt in effusive expletives and impotent threats. It’s inherent to the breed. God forbid you say something bad about Harley. They’ll ban you from their forums. Ask me how I know.
So I look at this episode with a sort of sad pathos. What kind of world am I living in, where a guy can’t just say what he thinks about an old car engine? What kind of social and political background radiation has left us with this aggressive comment default mode? You see it everywhere.
I’m sorry you were the target of an overreaction from said individual. But I’ve stopped commenting as much online, because I just don’t need the aggravation from this kind of sad sack. Who knows? Maybe they’ll come stalking me in my garage or something.
Be careful, David. I have developed a taste for your articles, and I want them to continue.
I think whenever the writers of the autopian get emails like this, they should record themselves reading them out loud, like the celebrities do with mean tweets. It’d be hilarious. 🙂
Also, AMC winning races on the drag strip? Broooooo. Even the Ford/GM funny cars use Hemis, wtf is this guy smoking, chrysler DOMINATED big HP v8s.
My most memorable college teaching evaluation, from years ago when these were done on paper, was from an anonymous student who, instead of filling out the form, wrote in large block capitals across the sheet’s entire diagonal span MIKE MUST DIE. As an instructor it’s always nice to know when you’ve reached someone.
I would put that thing in a frame and hang it on the wall. The sentiment is awful and completely non-constructive, but what a great conversation starter!
I kept it but never framed it. That was a few office moves ago, though, so it’s around… somewhere.
The fact you kinda glossed over “and trash an entire line of engines that is known for beating the Big 3 on the drag strip and in many other racing outlets from it’s inception until present day” really shows what an AMC fan you are. That phrase right there slips past hyperbole, past fanatical devotion to AMC, straight to someone desperately in need of some assistance. As some one who has liked motorsports since the 80’s but was never loyal to any of the four, I think the AMC V8 was only “known” for being a 304, a 360, or a 401, never for being successful. (actually wasn’t there a 390?)
I hope John gets the help he needs and I hope y’all’s paths don’t cross before he does.
Yeah, the late 60’s AMC V8 sizes were 290, 343 and 390. The changed the block a little in 1970 and added a bit of stroke, then the sizes were 304, 360 and 401.
Good Gawd, I’m sorry you had to experience this, David. While I may have a low regard for your planning skills, housekeeping abilities and organizational skills in general, you are also undeniably one of the nicest human beings on the planet. And I don’t believe anyone cares more for cars in general and Jeeps in particular than you do.
I hope “John” sees your gracious response and feels properly bad for his unhinged email.
What is wrong with this guy? I mean, who the hell still calls them tappets?
I wouldn’t worry about John, if he didn’t already pop an aneurysm after hitting send he will soon come to a tragic end crushed by a pile of hoarded AMC V8 parts.
I’m not even going to try to make a clever remark here. If anyone just read this and thinks that it’s an appropriate way to speak to anyone about anything — let alone a stranger and something as inconsequential as a long out-of-production car motor — then I urge you to take a deep breath and do some introspection. You matter, and there are people who love you. You are defined my more than just your interests. Please don’t carry around anger; it will only hurt you in the end. Consider getting help if you think you might need it.
Counterpoint- If you send an unhinged and threatening email to a stranger because they criticized an inanimate object that you like, then you are unloveable. Have fun ruining Thanksgiving later this year!
Thank you, David, for sticking up for language. Not enough automobile sites understand the crucial role of parallelism in writing.
Yeah parallelism matters, but in this case David is wrong and the email writer is correct.
“making a living” is parallel with the whole clause, “getting attention for himself to sell merch”. Not just to, “to sell merch”.
You may not much like the tone of this person’s email but there’s not much in his grammar or spelling you can reasonably take exception to.
All humor aside, I would report this as he may have other issues and looking for reason to snap and follow through. You do not want to be that person. A death threat, even with no intent to follow through, is a death threat and needs to be taken seriously.
As visit from the local authorities would allow them to assess. You also don’t want to see a news story that starts with “He was such a nice guy and then snapped”.
If you do go Florida, remember to make your drink of choice Bud Light. 🙂
I need to hire John to reply some of my emails from work lol
Let’s be honest here. You were very nice and courteous in your response. If you really wanted to grind him.down you could have forwarded all the bots in the comments to his email address.
Personally the best 360 in my opinion will always be the Chrysler 360.
My vote’s for the Subaru 360, if only because I hope to encourage Mercedes or Torch to seek out one of Bricklin’s littlest follies.
I propose we start a go fund me to hire that Robo T Rex that was a staple at 90s monster truck shows, and David can yank that thing out of his Golden eagle. We can watch in delight as Robo t Rex’s devours the precious 350 as we roast hotdogs around its burning corpse. I’m in for $50
This kind of overreaction reminds me of a thing I wrote a while back on the old Oppo about an old beat up Ford F series truck with the old crappy, no-pollution-controls 7.3L diesel… and how they owner left it running while he went into the local McDonalds to have a meal while his crappy old truck caused needless pollution.
And I recall mentioning how I look forward to the transition to BEVs and how it will result in fewer and fewer vehicles like that old polluting POS.
Apparently that got picked up on some article feed and led to a bunch of diesel bros posting similar messages insulting me and defending that crappy old diesel.
According to the diesel bros, I’m clearly a woman who is also gay… they refused to see me for the Meaty Goodness that I actually am!
LOL
Anyway David… I’m glad you wrote the truth about the AMC V8. I always wondered why it never had the following that other V8s like the SBC or the Ford Windsor engine had… even back in the 1970s.
There will always be idiots out there who will find strange hills to die on.
If we are going to go with stereotypes, a woman who is also gay would know a thing or two about engines, though they would be most likely to have very strong opinions of head gaskets on horizontally-opposed six cylinders.
Obviously David has not worked on many old weird sized Ford V8’s either as they have plentyof WTF moments with Engineering decisions. but definitely the older odder stuff is much harder to find parts for and tus more frustrating to work on. Water pumps integrated nto timing covers is just stupid and they do it today in some vehicles, hell ford famously buries the water pump behind the timeing system in the durtec v6’s mounted trnaversely. I recall the old 3.4 Euro DOHC GM V6 being packaged so frustratingly for me that I scrapped that stupid car.
But even the ones that people go on about as beinglegends have issues. Tupi Heads on the 4.0, the distributorless ignition. Hell my first car I ever drove was a 68 Javelin with a 232 straight six. I was six. but I do recall that thing leaving us stranded a time or two.
I have recently worked on my buddies 7.3 diesel and can say that installing down tubes and water pumps and even just alternators in that thing is knuckle skinning and frustrating. Nothing perfect and of course as much as AMC used other peoples vehicle parts as they did, if so desired, I am sure a Chrysler 360 would bolt up to that 727 trans.
A Chrysler 360 (or a Ford 360) won’t bolt up to a AMC 727, just like a Chevy small block won’t bolt up to the TH400 in my CJ-7 – in front of a 304. They have different bellhousing patterns.
While Dave is right about many things here, truth is all domestic V8’s from the mid 70’s sucked. However, with a few simple mods, you can get good power out of most all of them. I put a factory 4-bbl with a Motorcraft 4350 in place of the 2-bbl 2150 in my old Jeep Cherokee with a 360, and there was a significant increase in power.
I put a cam and a Edelbrock 4bbl in my CJ-7, and again, big power gains.
Similarly, I put a cam, intake and headers on the notorious ‘boat-anchor’ 400 in my 78 F-150 and the power gains were amazing. I could burn the 35″ tires off it, and it could tow a 7k lb load up the steepest grade on the east coast (I-40 near Asheville, NC) without downshifting or reducing speed.
On the other hand, much of the 4.0L mystique is hype. I know of plenty of those engines with problem that lead to rebuild at around 150k miles. Yeah, some of them last a long time, and they will run with a surprising amount of abuse. But I don’t know if just being able to run with the rods knocking is a big win.
Just had to skip straight to the comments to commend you for doubling down in the headline on the initial premise of the death threat, it was the laugh I needed this morning.
Damn, you’re absolutely right. This unhinged weirdo defied the unhinged weirdo stereotype and actually wrote with clarity of purpose, coherent sentence structure, and mostly on point grammar.
I have a couple likely theories on this John guy’s background:
My first is he’s a curmudgeonly former AMC employee, likely an engineer, who spent some time working in product development and didn’t make the cut when Chrysler bought AMC in ’87. He was summarily told: “John, you’re an unhinged weirdo and Chrysler doesn’t need you as they already have a good supply of unhinged weirdos.” John’s never gotten over it some 35 years later. He’s probably working at the post office and collecting firearms.
My second theory is John is vice president of some local AMC owners club who proudly drives a pristine, museum quality, 1969 Ambassador wagon with the 360. It’s never given him a lick of trouble because he changes his oil monthly and uses a dental pick to detail the back his window cranks as part of his normal routine. He shamelessly wears a railroad engineer cap to car shows and his Ambassador is his only real friend, (who you’ve grievously insulted).
My third and final theory is Torch and Mercedes wrote it and are just effing with you and giggling about it right now.
Hopefully the real John is a harmless old fart who uses a a mobility chair to get out to the mailbox and mostly spends his days watching a lot of Andy Griffith episodes on the CW.
I suspect a variant of your first theory: that John was a long-time employee at the Kenosha (Wisconsin) Engine Plant and really drank the Kool-Aid regarding the superior quality of the old AMC engines. That plant closed down a decade ago, and the 360 hadn’t been built for two decades before that. So we’re looking at someone who’s retired, perhaps unwillingly, sublimating his pain into threatening journalists on the Internet.
I think it’s option 1A. John’s father was an engineer on the engine and spent many long nights and weekends neglecting his son to work on it. John internalized this to such an extent he now views the 360 as a member of his family that’s so perfect his father could love it even though he couldn’t love John.
If he defends it hard enough, Dad will notice.
And he never made a Jason hair comment? This guy is an amatuer
I really enjoyed the live reading of the email at the going away party. I think that email sets the bar for writing effective hate mail. It was truly impressive.
You could just feel the passion with every hateful line.
I am going to forward this article to the writers of White Lotus. I think a TV adaption of this could make for a nice plot twist or secondary story on the next installment of this groundbreaking series.
I expect in the future we will find some item about a person found dead in an intimate embrace with an AMC 360 identified only by the initial J
If he was really that upset, he could have showed up at your going away party. If you want to really make him upset, figure out his IP address and block him from accessing your stupid website.
I liked the you people salvo ala Robert Downey Jr in Tropic Thunder.