I cannot believe a “shed skid” is an actual thing that Australian car-folks do. In the U.S., owners of powerful cars will sometimes head out to an empty road, place a foot on the brake and dip the other deep into the accelerator pedal to light up the rear tires. Americans like to think of themselves as the world’s burnout kings, but I think that distinction has to go to the Australians, and the “shed skid” is only a part of the reason why. Let’s have a look at this marvelous down-under-wonder, as well as a concept called a “shed crawl.”
Let me begin by explaining why Australia holds the title of Burnout Capital of the World. It’s not because doing a burnout here (Again, for those of you just joining, I’m near Dubbo trying to fix a truly impossible project car) is particularly easy. The cops are absurdly strict, and folks just seem to be less tolerant of others lighting up rubber on public streets. Doing a burnout anywhere near civilization in Australia is just asking for a world of trouble from the authorities.
Australia’s burnout supremacy is not about how lax the laws are, it’s about how the country has reacted to them. Check this out:
And this:
Behold “Summernats”; anyone from Australia has surely heard of it. Often regarded as a bit of a “Bogan” (read: redneck) mecca, the event is where the most epic burnouts on earth occur in absurd quantities. These aren’t just static burnouts, either; they involve a “tip-in,” — essentially a 360-degree turn mid-burnout. The winners of such burnout competitions (they happen throughout the country; the one below is at the Kandos Street Machine Festival, which includes a burnout competition) are cool cars that execute that tip-in just right, and that wow the audience with some kind of flamboyant style — perhaps it’s noise, perhaps it’s paint, or perhaps it’s how the driver wins the crowd over with their driving style or some other form of showboating.
I just spent hours watching YouTube videos on Australian burnout competitions with my host and Autopian reader, Laurence. There’s just something about a burnout that meshes well with Australians, particularly those living in the country. Given that the nation is rather strict (especially compared to the U.S.), it’s this tension between people who want nothing more than to light up tires in a country that cracks down on it hard that ultimately creates the greatest organized burnout competitions on earth. It also creates a hilarious concept known as a “Shed skid” — a smoky burnout that any layperson can do legally in the confines of their “shed” (garage).
Yes, car enthusiasts actually, and proudly, lay humongous, permanent black rubber marks on their own garage floors. And I’m not just talking about one or two Australians, I’m talking about lots of people. Seriously, the local hotrodder who has been helping me fix my Valiant did one in his garage; his wife sent me a video of the shenanigans:
This is a fascinatingly silly part of Australian car culture, with my host saying: “Among rev heads [here in Australia], it’s common,” going on to tell me that the reason why likely has to do with the fact that “[Australian] cops are so heavy handed on street skids.”
It’s a reminder that, no matter which restrictions the government imposes, car-nuts always find a way. And in fact, those restrictions can actually enhance car culture. It’s like when the state of California created a law requiring a minimum vehicle ride-height in the 1950s as a response to low-rider culture; the result was Ron Aguirre grabbing some hydraulic rams normally used to pull dents at a body shop and inventing hydraulic suspension for his Corvette called X-Sonic. When the authorities create limitations, people figure out a way to get their fix — in the case of Australian burnouts, that fix is the greatest burnout competitions on earth and the “shed skid.”
Let’s look at some folks laying thick rubber stripes in their own garage floors:
As you can see, sometimes “shed skids” happen on driveways, oftentimes actually inside garages, and in some cases on a special skid pad on someone’s property. Speaking of, there’s apparently a thing here in Australia called the “Shed Crawl.” Though not as popular as the shed skid, a shed crawl basically involves people spending a whole day driving or walking from one garage to the next, hanging out at each place, maybe drinking a beer and just looking at the garage-owner’s car projects and workspace setup.
Here are a couple of videos showing two sheds from a 2020 Shed Crawl:
I can dig it; I’d love to organize a Detroit-area “shed crawl.” I’d also love to have some friends over for a party, and rip a huge burnout in my garage, because doing one on a public street really isn’t a good idea.
Australian car culture is amazing, as I will make clear as I continue this “Oz Oddities” column. Last time I showed you a ridiculously janky turbocharged dirt bike that may or may not actually function; stay tuned to hear about how in Australia, the four-door classic car reigns supreme, whereas in the U.S. it has always been stuck in the shadow of “prettier” two-door cars. Also, I’ll get into why Australians so frequently travel to “Mexico,” and I’ll talk about some weird Australian car laws. Plus, we need to talk about Australia’s ultimate “cheap power” redneckmobile, akin to the Crown Vic – the AU Falcon.
Man I love this place.
I hate to be a killjoy. Unless you’re warming up your tires for a drag race I’ve never understood burnouts. It’s just masturbating in public. But, you’re only destroying your own property so have at it.
They transfer their own destroyed property from private hands to public hands in the form of molecules too small and too dispersed to clean up.
.
I wonder when we will get the seemingly inevitable post from David explaining why rescuing the Valiant has become impossible and blaming it all on meeting some random country girl with a magical potion in a silver bag called goon.
Been to a few gatherings here in the states where similar garage burnout shenanigans where done, although I’ve never heard of it being a common thing over here, certainly not to the point of it having it’s own name. Didn’t “hoon” and “hoonigan” originate in Oz as well?
I think a collection of dramatic shed skid fails would be more entertaining than watching properly-executed, indoor burnouts.
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What happens when someone’s shed really is on fire? The fire department thinks it’s another shed skid.
I wanted to like this craziness till I saw them flying a southern traitor flag in fucking Australia .
Tracy, the Maloo video got me to thinking…only 3 more years till importing Holden Utes can be a thing. Will there be inventory to make that happen? Would it be worth it, do you think, given the stuff that might be available? They look terribly cool to me, cool in a way the SSR tried and failed at imo, like a modern day El Camino/Ranchero. Am I wrong about that?
David,
Appears that you haven’t slept since the plane trip. Get some sleep!!! Wrenching all day, wild parties in junkyards, hanging around sheds with burnouts until the wee hours. Then blogging till dawn and God knows what else.
You’re mother just texted America asking why you haven’t called. Don’t worry we covered for you. Jason told her that you’ve contracted a horrible infection and are out of commision for 4 weeks.
You’re welcome.
Whoops typo, dammit. Should be “Your mother”
“Well, Mrs. Tracy, David forgot to get his tetanus booster. Needless to say we all know where he spends his free time…”
It seems to me that David is intending to move to the wrong place. It seems Australia is more appropriate given his automotive predilections than California.
Looking at the subsequent insurance claims forms will be a laugh a minute; “For unknown reasons a fire spread from the garage area into the house…”
Alright Tracy, Quit screwing around and get back to work. I am beginning to think you have given up on those two piles of rust. I has spoken! Brummbaer
For some reason, I read that as sounding like Treebeard in LotR.
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The tire companies must love this! They ever ban this craziness, tire sales will drop 25 per cent! Lmao
Ahh yes well actually…down here, used tyres are cheap to buy but, by law, expensive to dispose of. My last set of four cost me AU$50 to dispose of at the tyre shop. Dumping them costs even more. So you might as well wreck them utterly…
So many reposted tweets. It’s like reading a Yahoo “article.”
Based on the fact that we haven’t seen any report or video of his actual efforts and instead are getting a whole lot of filler, I am going to say the trip was a bust.
This is how to live a happy life!
Obviously never met Cleetus McFarland…..and never attended a Cleetus and cars burnout contest, much less SEMA and the Hoonigan pit out front.
Cleetus didn’t know what a burnout was until he went to Summernats with 1320 a few years ago…and I reckon a few Aussie skid cars already have the Hoonigan pit sorted
https://youtu.be/sl4MDgigN6o
Isn’t DT supposed to be wrenching on something? Isn’t there some kind of deadline?
In an early article, they’ve already stated the project was cactus.
I’m still hoping for a surprise success story, though.
* Clicks on through to the articles on air pollution, global warming and wasted natural resources.*
the massive ozone hole over australia makes a lot more sense now
I guess I’m going to be that guy, but as someone who works in the field of pulmonology and sees the effects that breathing heavy smoke on your health, it pains me to watch people breath in all that tire smoke. This is how you give yourself COPD and cancer.
Yeah, I never understood burnouts in any context. I value the ability to breathe far more than whatever happens in a burnout.
DOCTOR: Mate ,what have you been doing? Your lungs are shot.
PATIENT: SORRY WHAT? I CANT HEAR A THING.
I just spent hours watching YouTube videos on Australian burnout competitions with my host and Autopian reader, Laurence.
:cracks whip:
You aren’t in Australia to watch youtube! Get ta work, ya bogan!
Get to work ya bludger would be the more appropriate vernacular. 🙂
Oh great, a rebel flag in the 2nd to last video. What a wonderful bit of ‘culture’ to export.
I had the same reaction to the “Lynchy”- ugh
That term doesn’t have the same connotation in Aus. It’s more likely the guys surname is Lynch and this is his nickname
I cant see it very well.It’s a confederate flag right?
To be fair i’m not sure they understand what it means.
Things get mixed up in translation.The dude probably thinks it’s anti government or something
I love this whole Australia series. But am I the only one a little worried that David’s quest to discover Australian car culture will actually turn into an in-depth exploration of (overlapping but not identical) Bogan culture? Has David interacted with a single woman since arriving in Australia?
I don’t think that DT will understand the question if he sees it. You need to ask if he’s interacted with a Sheila since arriving in Australia.
Mate, I’m not here to f*ck spiders (look that one up; it’s good). I’ve got a feral ute to build.
I am familiar with the term, but homes, we’re talking shayluhs, not spayduhs
So yu’re hanging around for the Melbourne Cup a few months away? The infield action is…well, interesting.
https://youtu.be/E0xn2zelzbQ
https://www.zmonline.com/the-latest/photos-the-drunken-aftermath-of-the-melbourne-cup-2017/
https://www.zmonline.com/photos/zm-photos/drunk-girls-of-melbourne-cup/?photo=15
https://www.heraldsun.com.au/sport/superracing/melbourne-cup-2013/drunken-melbourne-cup-day-antics-begin-in-flemington/news-story/ac3e68e16bdece10f6bb57f69d26a776
https://www.news.com.au/sport/superracing/melbourne-cup/melbourne-cup-2019-revellers-kick-on-after-the-race-day-finishes/news-story/6b343a0ab739e33e21ab812aaacabe68
https://www.thesun.co.uk/news/4876840/melbourne-cup-ladies-day-australia-woman-bush/
In Australia spiders fuck you (up).
😉
“That’s not a burnout… THAT’s a burnout.”
that’s a spoon
I see you’ve played shedy/spoony before.