“Somewhere in this garage is the megalodon of spiders,” I kept thinking as I worked on the $900 Chrysler Valiant ute I’d purchased sight unseen in Australia. I’d gotten a quick glimpse of the gargantuan arachnid a few weeks into my project, but after turning away for just a few seconds, the thing scurried off into the darkness. For a week I wrenched knowing that a behemoth lurked in the garage near Dubbo, New South Wales, and then one day, as I walked in to try to fix the hopeless wreck I’d bought 10,000 miles from my home, the hideous beast showed up, sitting on a wall in plain sight, stretching its legs as if to boast of its enormity.
Before I get to megalodon, I should mention the many, many other large spiders I encountered in that garage in Australia, and the effects they had on my overall wrenching experience (I’d also mention the effects on my psyche, but I’ll leave that between me and a therapist). The very first day I started on my project, which — along with the parts car — had sat in a field for years and thus become home to all sorts of critters, I was loosening a screw holding a disintegrated taillight-housing to the rear quarter panel. As I was spinning the ratchet, a neighbor who’d come to visit told me to step back. “Oh boy,” I thought. “This is Australia. If someone says ‘David, step back!’ things are about to go down.” Luckily for me, the neighbor hadn’t been shielding me from anything that could kill me, though it was definitely something that could have caused me to wet my trousers. Behold the mighty Huntsman Spider that was a mere inch away from my hand:
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It’s big:
I recall that a few minutes later I had to reach my hand into the rear quarter panel just behind the taillights (possibly to undo an electrical connector or grab the back side of a bolt), but since it was dark in there, I walked away to get a flashlight so I could scope the place out first. I can’t be reaching blindly into dark places; this is Australia, after all. The neighbor I was with, Hud Johnston (a hot-rodder whom you’ll all hear about in upcoming articles) didn’t have time for my childishness, and just reached his arm deep into the dark abyss and grabbed what needed grabbing. I was a bit embarrassed, I’ll admit. Almost as embarrassed as when my host Laurence and his mom asked me to pick up the tarp that had been sitting out in the paddock where my utes had sat for many months. I looked under it to find a bunch of Huntsman Spiders.
I tried shaking them off, but they wouldn’t let go, so I carefully carried the tarp, shaking it every now and then to prevent the leggy beasts from latching onto my hand. From the outside, I looked like a complete dork, and Laurence and his mom rightfully let me know it.
A week or so after my initial spider encounter in the garage, when I opened up the door to start another day of work on the ute, I saw this hanging from my firewall:
This was a problem. I had to do some work underhood, and just knowing that beast was there just wasn’t going to work for me. Unfortunately, I cannot get myself to kill spiders, no matter how hideous they are. It’s just hard for me to justify if they’re not particularly harmful and generally leaving me alone. I’m killing them because I find them scary? My weakness isn’t a good enough reason.
So I had no choice but to try to capture the eight-legged monster. This took forever — at least 30 minutes — and that’s 30 minutes I didn’t have, as the project was way behind. Chasing this ridiculously fast critter around the garage wasn’t easy; when it started walking up the lift post, I knew I had to catch it there or it’d climb up and out of my reach. I struggled for minutes trying to build the nerve to just catch the spider in a box, but that meant I had to get up-close, and my weak self just wasn’t feeling great about that.
My solution was a broomstick with a cheese box taped to it.
It actually worked quite well, as it allowed me to keep some distance from the spider, and the plastic box was smooth enough that it kept the spider from crawling out until I could get the lid on. (I would have liked to have used a box that wasn’t labeled “strong & bitey,” but it’s what I had available):
I released the Huntsman into the grass, and Hud used some cardboard to usher it away from the garage:
Here’s a video of the encounter:
A few weeks in I began seeing Huntsman Spiders almost daily. They were in the car, under the car, on the garage walls, behind toolboxes — everywhere.
There came a time when I had to do some wiring under the dash, and I knew that somewhere in the vehicle was a Huntsman Spider, as I’d spotted it before. What was I going to do, just not complete the project? That wasn’t an option, so I pushed on and tried to ignore the fact that a three-inch spider could be just inches from my face. I had work to do.
Over time, I became comfortable with the arachnids, as long as they didn’t surprise me. I even began touching them:
Three weeks in I actually allowed one to crawl on my hand, briefly. And while I know that may not impress anyone, the reality is that spiders were among my worst fears when I started this project. Anytime I saw one, even on video, I’d become hyper-sensitive and feel phantom spiders on my body. Rational? Not at all. Why is a 170 pound man afraid of a non-deadly 0.01 pound spider? This was something I was keen to overcome, and I can say that, after some time working on those two spider-infested utes in that garage in Australia, I made some good headway. At least, that’s what I thought — until I spotted megalodon.
This was a spider that I’m fairly sure killed another humongous Huntsman Spider that was hanging upside down, dead in the ceiling of the garage. I remember thinking how huge that dead spider was, turning away, then looking at it again, only to glimpse just a few inches away a spider that was, somehow, almost twice as big. It was megalodon, and though it disappeared for a week, it eventually showed back up:
To give you an understanding of this thing’s size, just have a look at this photo:
Notice how the rightmost leg is touching the peak of the right rib on the garage siding. The leftmost leg appears to be a centimeter or so away from the beginning of the slope of the left rib. For context, I placed my hand in roughly this same position:
That’s a five-inch spider — at least. Even I, a now-much-tougher man who can touch large Huntsman Spiders, couldn’t help but get goosebumps at the sight of megalodon.
Thank goodness most of the Huntsman Spiders I’d seen were smaller, or I’d have been far too scared to do any wrenching on those two utes. I’d already wasted far too much time trying to get the nerve to capture the three-inch spiders. A five or six inch one like megalodon would have required hours of mental preparation, a longer broomstick, and a bigger Strong & Bitey box.
Oddly, when I later saw a hyper-venomous Redback Spider atop my brake drum, I didn’t feel scared at all. Talk about awful human instinct: Scared of a largely-harmless Huntsman, but totally fine with a deadly Redback.
nuke it from orbit, that’s the only way to be sure
“Oddly, when I later saw a hyper-poisonous Redback Spider atop my brake drum, I didn’t feel scared at all. Talk about awful human instinct: Scared of a largely-harmless Huntsman, but totally fine with a deadly Redback.”
See, this is why I have a zero tolerance policy for spiders. Sure, most of them can’t kill me, but the day I run across a Brown Recluse or something else legitimately dangerous I won’t be lulled into a false sense of security.
NOPE, NOPE.
ABSOLUTELY NOT.
With all this talk of lethal wildlife, it brings to mind a conversation I had with a German colleague awhile back. He said that there aren’t any animals that can kill you in Germany. I replied “that sounds kinda boring”.
Maybe a warning message for the Arachnophobes amongst us.
The title containg the phrase “World’s Biggest Spiders” didn’t tip you off? 😉
Unless they surprise me, I typically immediately form an agreement with any spider I find in that, again, as long as they don’t surprise me, they may do what they want.
“What they want” typically aligns with my goals of keeping other bugs out of my house, so there is zero reason to harm them. My wife will tell me to kill a spider if she finds one and I flat out refuse.
That’s a nope. Lost cause, fire is the only answer now.
nuke it from orbit, that’s the only way to be sure
I lived in Melbourne and it’s the only time in my life I’ve routinely made my bed every morning. Crawling into bed with a huntsman set me straight. They’re actually a bit goofy though. I remember they’d crawl up and down a wall outside the TV room at night – reminded me of the ‘whacky wall walker’ toy you’d get in the cereal box as a kid.
However, a different Aussie arachnid tale went sideways. A girlfriend came to visit and we were coming home late one evening. She was still loopy with jetlag and I had been joking with her about all of the dangerous creatures – hopefully in an effort to set her at ease. (Nothing like the narcissism of an American to think that of the millions of people that live here – your particular two weeks in country will lead to suffering and death). As I pulled my key out to unlock the front gate she laughed and said, “Oh yeah, and you’re going to tell me THAT is a real spider, right?” I turned and noticed a massive spider (perhaps not a huntsman? – it had a really big abdomen) perched perfectly above the lock, facing the ground. Instinctively I recoiled, revealing the fact it was a real spider. Never before or since have I seen a human vomit tears from their eyes the way she did. I took off a shoe and killed it. It was so big it made an audible “thud” when it hit the pavement. She didn’t sleep that night. The next week at work a local, in true Aussie fashion, said, “Oh mate, you should not have smashed it. Its belly was full of babies, now you’ll have thousands in your house.” As if a pregnant spider was going to relocate if I didn’t kill it. God I miss Australia. The locals and their razzing made living there 10 times better than it already was.
Well done Mr. Tracy! You are a lot braver than I am!
Plz no more horrifying spider articles ever. Gonna go try to calm down with some tail lights.
Nope.
Nope nope nope nope nope.
Nope.
If you want to humanely trap the spiders easily; get a funnel, stretch some cloth across the big end and tape it down. Now attach the other end to a vacuum cleaner (more tape probably), then you can suck up the spiders without killing them, and deposit them outside.
Or if you can find an extra length of vacuum cleaner hose and a bucket, you could make an oversized ‘pooter’ (or ‘aspirator’).
talk about double standards; someone can have a 6-inch tall dog and it’s “adorable”
but as soon as I tame a 6-inch wide spider as a pet people call it “horrifying”.
Making friends with the local wildlife I see! I’ve got a similar view on the wolf spiders in my area, don’t like to kill them if I don’t have to even though they creep me out a bit. I’ve come across some large ones but nothing like your megalodon. I figure they’re busy chasing down and eating the other bugs I really don’t want to deal with. Same thing with garter snakes, they don’t bother me and help keep the rodent population down.
“Same thing with garter snakes, they don’t bother me and help keep the rodent population down.”
I dunno where you live but if you are in their range try to get some opossums on the job too.
I commend your bravery, I was sweating just reading this article.
All I could think was “what would happen if I shop-vac’ed up one of those, would it break out and come for me?”
The other day a pretty hearty wolf spider crawled up over the shower curtain while I was in there. My wife was brushing her teeth and saw it in the mirror and screamed, I knew it was a spider problem right away so I bravely opened the shower curtain only to see the horror on her face, it wasn’t after her, it wanted me. I jumped out, almost slipping to my death (exactly what the spider would’ve wanted). I suggested we move, but my wife got the shop vac with all of the extensions and we sucked it up from about 6 feet away.
I wonder if my kids will be scared of spiders too?
“opened the shower curtain only to see the horror on her face”
I get the same reaction from my wife.
The neighbour is Hud Johnston? Having seen some of the stuff he and his dad have built over the years, you’ve got some awesome help there!
https://www.whichcar.com.au/features/rod-and-hud-johnston-custom-fj-holden
There’s an excellent wildlife documentary series called Wild Things With Dominic Monaghan (yeah, of Lost and LOTR fame) where he traveled around the world in search of various insects and reptiles as well as other fauna (Monaghan’s allergies to some mammals were partly why he became so interested in insects & reptiles in childhood.) Monaghan was a little similar to Steve Irwin the Crocodile Hunter in terms of interacting with the various fauna he would encounter on his show; some of the fauna included the largest spiders on the planet, some of which were as big or even bigger than megadolon. It might or might not alleviate some of the fears that some people have of such critters to watch the show on account of Monaghan’s enthusiasm for said critters. After all, phobias and regular ol’ fears are indeed legitimate, nothing to scoff at, so kudos for acquiring some comfort, as it were, around these huntsman spiders, aside from megadolon! Given that it was a British series it might be readily available to watch in Australia though time might be at a premium in light of the tight schedule for getting the ute on the road…
“Scared of a largely-harmless Huntsman, but totally fine with a deadly Redback.”
Oh just wait till you get back to California to our own even deadlier Black Widows and sizable Tarantulas including the recently discovered native of Folsom, the 15cm long Man in Black himself:
The Johnny Cash tarantula!
https://spideridentifications.com/aphonopelma-johnnycashi.html
(Don’t worry, they’re harmless but very, very cool!)
There is something to look forward to too. If you’re lucky you might get a visit from America’s very own (and only) marsupial.
Haha ,great to hear it David. Soon you’ll be juggling snakes
between giant killer camel spiders, and “daddy long legs are the most venomous spider in the world” I’m not sure which nonsensical scary story about a non spider non venomous arachnid I’ve heard more times.
accidentally posted this twice. made much more sense as a reply to another comment
Even as an Aussie expat myself I don’t fault you at all for being skiddish around.
Also, fun fact, my great uncle was a dairy farmer in Bega and at one point his farm’s milk made up most of the Bega cheese being produced.
…around spiders. Curse you, lack of edit button!
Agree. Need edit button massively. But it’s ‘skittish’ I think. Unless you’re Ken Block.
Reading this a certain way – it sounds like you’re suggesting that spiders are somehow part of the Bega cheese production process.
Would explain that “strong and bitey” on the box.
Good point but who did the later videos? Maybe a government conspiracy?
Hey DT I am very impressed you overcame your spider fears. I don’t fear them as much but I also have no problem just killing them. These are common arachnids so only the most loony environmentalist would complain. Remember there are thousands of insects in any house so you killing one won’t destroy the world. Check out Iraqi dessert spider they have a body 9 inch and can kill you.
But I have a great idea. Trap as many Huntsman spiders as you can. And right before you take the car in for inspection release them in different places on the car. Inspector won’t check closely so you pass. Have you never heard when life gives you lemons make lemonade?
Also I’m pretty sure there is a video of someone, probably you, doing the spider dance. Post it your Australian friends will if you don’t.
The “Iraqi dessert spider”? You mean the camel spider? They’re not actually spiders, they aren’t venemous, they don’t grow that big, and they don’t even have fangs. The idea that they’re huge and deadly has been a popular myth for decades.
between giant killer camel spiders, and “daddy long legs are the most venomous spider in the world” I’m not sure which nonsensical scary story about a non spider non venomous arachnid I’ve heard more times.
Daddy longlegs: also not actually spiders.
Yeah, he just said that.
I like your thinking! Unfortunately the inspector would write ‘unable to check’ = fail
I would hate to find that man-killer Iraqi spider in my dessert…
How do we know that spider didn’t actually write this article after disposing of DT?
Good point but who did the later videos? Maybe a government conspiracy?
3 spiders in a trenchcoat.
Not a single jeep reference….no illusions of grandeur about a timeline that will never be met and was impossible from the beginning…..
You might be on to something here…..
No mention of anything being a holy grail? Definitely a spider’s work.
Free advice David. Don’t go to Central America! I once saw a spider hunting a rather large frog in Costa Rica. I really wish I could post the pic to blow your mind.
I grew up in America’s South West.
Black Widow and huge wolf spiders (sometimes sporting 100+ piggybacking babies) were common. Rattlesnakes too.
You just deal with em and get used to it because you don’t have a choice.
Eventually I grew more interested in them than afraid.
Funny thing is, after living the last 20 years in the PNW, I’ve become more afraid of spiders.
Doesn’t make sense.
Oh, you do have a choice:
a. Flamethrower
b. Hammer
c. Move
d. All of the above